The Funniest People in Sports and Neighborhoods

He hired a little person—formerly known as a midget—to bat for his team. The little person wore a uniform that belonged to the seven-year-old son of a team vice president, and he used a toy bat. ... 13-14. The Funniest People in Sports 81.

Author: David Bruce

Publisher: Lulu.com

ISBN: 9781430300304

Category: Humor

Page: 240

View: 950

Download →

This book contains such anecdotes as these: 1) Bob Zuppke coached the football Illini for years. In a discussion of football rules, someone described a play and asked whether the officials had made the right call. Before answering, however, Mr. Zuppke asked, "Which team made the foul-Illinois or the other one?" 2) At a Westminster Dog Show in Madison Square Garden, a woman was selling an expensive coat made for dogs. Saying "We want her dog to look as smart as madame," the saleslady held up a pink cocktail coat made out of embroidered silk with a lining of mohair. Sportswriter Robert Lipsyte asked her, "When would a dog wear that?" The saleslady replied, "After five o'clock." 3) Shannon Martin was six years old when she won an age-12-and-under roping contest, for which she was written up in the "Roping Sports News." Because she hadn't learned to read yet, she kept saying to her father, "Come on, Dad. Read it again."
Posted in:

The Funniest People in Comedy and Relationships 500 Anecdotes

Books by David Bruce (1954- ) The Funniest People in Books and Music: 500 Anecdotes 250 Anecdotes About Writers, ... Pets, and More The Funniest People in Sports and Neighborhoods: 500 Anecdotes 250 Anecdotes About Baseball Players, ...

Author: David Bruce

Publisher: Lulu.com

ISBN: 9781847287809

Category: Humor

Page: 212

View: 244

Download →

This book contains such anecdotes as these: 1) In his Answer Man column, film critic Roger Ebert answered a question by Matt Sandler about who was the world's most beautiful woman by saying that she was Indian actress Aishwarya Rai. In a later Answer Man column, a reader stated that Mr. Ebert should have answered the question by saying, "My wife." However, Mr. Ebert had a good reason for not answering the question that way: "Matt Sandler asked about women, not goddesses." 2) To advertise its Razzles candy, Mars Candy decided to use a Cleveland, Ohio, show in which comedian Ron Sweed, aka The Ghoul, hosted several mostly bad horror movies. The Ghoul criticized the candy for weeks, and the more he criticized it, the more its sales went up. In gratitude, Mars Candy delivered a case of Razzles to The Ghoul. The case of candy remained on the set of The Ghoul's show for year--unopened.
Posted in:

The Kindest People Who Do Good Deeds Volume 3

The Coolest People in Comedy: 250 Anecdotes Create, Then Take a Break: 250 Anecdotes Don't Fear the Reaper: 250 ... in Neighborhoods: 250 Anecdotes The Funniest People in Relationships: 250 Anecdotes The Funniest People in Sports: 250 ...

Author: David Bruce

Publisher: Lulu.com

ISBN: 9780557050376

Category:

Page:

View: 583

Download →

Posted in:

The Kindest People Who Do Good Deeds Volume 1

... Funniest People in Music, Volume 3: 250 Anecdotes The Funniest People in Neighborhoods: 250 Anecdotes The Funniest People in Relationships: 250 Anecdotes The Funniest People in Sports: 250 Anecdotes The Funniest People in Sports, ...

Author: David Bruce

Publisher: Lulu.com

ISBN: 9781430314301

Category: Humor

Page: 184

View: 155

Download →

The doing of good deeds is important. As a free person, you can choose to live your life as a good person or as a bad person. To be a good person, do good deeds. To be a bad person, do bad deeds. If you do good deeds, you will become good. If you do bad deeds, you will become bad. To become the person you want to be, act as if you already are that kind of person. Each of us chooses what kind of person we will become. To become a hero, do the things a hero does. To become a coward, do the things a coward does. The opportunity to take action to become the kind of person you want to be is yours. ; ;This book collects 250 stories of good deeds from the arts, from religion, and from life.
Posted in:

The Kindest People Who Do Good Deeds Volume 2

... Funniest People in Music, Volume 3: 250 Anecdotes The Funniest People in Neighborhoods: 250 Anecdotes The Funniest People in Relationships: 250 Anecdotes The Funniest People in Sports: 250 Anecdotes The Funniest People in Sports, ...

Author: David Bruce

Publisher: Lulu.com

ISBN: 9781435701113

Category: Humor

Page: 168

View: 168

Download →

This book collects 250 stories about good deeds, including this one: When the great 19th-century actor Sir Henry Irving discovered an old woman who needed money to survive but who couldn't work, he would hire her to take care of the cats in his theater. Later, he was going to hire an old woman to take care of the cats, but then he discovered that he had already hired three old women to take care of the cats. Therefore, he hired this old woman to take care of the three old women who took care of the cats.
Posted in:

William Shakespeare s The Winter s Tale A Retelling in Prose

The Funniest People in Families, Volume 2: 250 Anecdotes The Funniest People in Families, Volume 3: 250 Anecdotes The ... in Neighborhoods: 250 Anecdotes The Funniest People in Relationships: 250 Anecdotes The Funniest People in Sports: ...

Author: David Bruce

Publisher: Lulu.com

ISBN: 9781329094246

Category:

Page: 153

View: 405

Download →

This is an easy-to-read version of William Shakespeare's romance "The Winter's Tale." People who read this retelling first will find Shakespeare's play easier to read and understand.
Posted in:

William Shakespeare s Richard III A Retelling in Prose

The Funniest People in Families, Volume 3: 250 Anecdotes The Funniest People in Families, Volume 4: 250 Anecdotes The ... in Neighborhoods: 250 Anecdotes The Funniest People in Relationships: 250 Anecdotes The Funniest People in Sports: ...

Author: David Bruce

Publisher: Lulu.com

ISBN: 9781329717411

Category: Fiction

Page: 200

View: 291

Download →

This is an easy-to-read retelling of William Shakespeare's history play ""Richard III."" People who read this retelling first will find the original play much easier to read and understand. Suppose you were born with physical disabilities but wanted to become King. Suppose you were brave in battle. Suppose you were able to convince the widow of a man you killed to marry you. Suppose you married her only so that your claim to the throne would be enhanced. Suppose you wanted your older brother, who is King, to die so that you can take his place. Suppose that you are willing to murder your other older brother so that you can become King. Suppose that you are willing to murder your nephews so that you can become King. Suppose that you are willing to murder your wife so that you can marry another woman who will enhance your claim to the throne. Suppose that you are willing to murder any supporters who have ceased to be of use to you in achieving your political ambitions.
Posted in:

William Shakespeare Richard II A Retelling in Prose

The Funniest People in Families, Volume 3: 250 Anecdotes The Funniest People in Families, Volume 4: 250 Anecdotes The ... in Neighborhoods: 250 Anecdotes The Funniest People in Relationships: 250 Anecdotes The Funniest People in Sports: ...

Author: David Bruce

Publisher: Lulu.com

ISBN: 9781365070631

Category: Fiction

Page: 150

View: 865

Download →

This is an easy-to-read retelling of William Shakespeare's "Richard II." People who read this version first will find the original play much easier to read and understand.
Posted in:

John Ford s The Broken Heart A Retelling

Don't Fear the Reaper: 250 Anecdotes The Funniest People in Art: 250 Anecdotes The Funniest People in Books: 250 ... in Neighborhoods: 250 Anecdotes The Funniest People in Relationships: 250 Anecdotes The Funniest People in Sports: 250 ...

Author: David Bruce

Publisher: Lulu.com

ISBN: 9781387559985

Category: Fiction

Page: 152

View: 987

Download →

This is an easy-to-read retelling of John Ford's THE BROKEN HEART. According to Charles Lamb, ""Ford was of the first order of poets. He sought for sublimity, not by parcels in metaphors or visible images, but directly where she has her full residence in the heart of man; in the actions and sufferings of the greatest minds.""
Posted in:

John Ford s Tis Pity She s a Whore A Retelling

Don't Fear the Reaper: 250 Anecdotes The Funniest People in Art: 250 Anecdotes The Funniest People in Books: 250 ... in Neighborhoods: 250 Anecdotes The Funniest People in Relationships: 250 Anecdotes The Funniest People in Sports: 250 ...

Author: David Bruce

Publisher: Lulu.com

ISBN: 9781387445134

Category: Fiction

Page: 156

View: 178

Download →

This is an easy-to-read retelling of John Ford's tragedy "'Tis Pity She's a Whore." In this tragedy, a brother and sister fall in love and commit incest.
Posted in: